You rip me in many directions. I sit here worried about my two family members who are sick right now as I try to focus on you.
Love makes me think of Martin Buber’s I-Thou relationship.
Anyway, I was inspired when you brought the people I love deeply and truly into my life.
I thought you would be easy. However, you are hard and you are something that must be worked at and must grow. I was talking earlier this week about the Golden Rule with someone who can’t, and maybe sometimes, won’t control themselves. It’s easy to spit out the Golden Rule: Love/ Treat your neighbor….yet if you don’t know what Love is or don’t understand it, you can’t do it, you can’t feel it.
Like everything else in life, we each have our own concept of you. How I think you should be, others do not. Like I said before, you rip me apart. You cause me great pleasure and pain at the same time. I love those those I am bonded to but don’t love the criticism I get from certain members. I love you because we are in this relationship together and sometimes that is as far as it gets.
I love running my business and I love when people see my value and compensate me for it. Yet I don’t love something as silly and stupid as my posts not published on Facebook. My business is a business and is equivalent to the big businesses as I have the same responsibilities.
I love being an EMT but I don’t love the crap calls.
I love when people will talk and explain directly.
I love helping others but I don’t love the often thankless situations I find myself in. I don’t love the people who expect me to do everything and then won’t raise a finger to help. I don’t love the people who try to take advantage of me. I burn when I am angry and they don’t see it coming. My heart may have been broken but I have picked up the pieces, glued them together again, and made the whole stronger each time.
I have been so overjoyed when you have landed in unexpected ways. When someone sends me candy as a thank you. I can savor the accomplishment and sweetness for several days. It may sound silly but those little things mean so much. Or when I found that little something I was looking for or found or saw that bird or other creature I really want to see. When I get kisses and hugs unexpectedly.
Dear Love, thank you for being you. Thank you for all the good, the positive.